Players:
Summary: Rashmi finally has enough, and lets Lucas go.
Date: July 10, 2010
Log Title: Broken
Rating: PG
Xavier Mansion - The Sanctuary
Across the threshold into the chapel is a small receiving foyer, dust and dirt coating the once welcoming room, which is now bereft of furniture or decor, save one framed painting, the glass covering it dark with smoke almost to the point of making the art and inscription impossible to read. Upon closer inspection, it is a painting of two women in an embrace, one older, one younger, the inscription reading 'For whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God. Ruth 1:16'.
Through the large double doors lies the main sanctuary, pews and alter still set up as they were when it was in use, however, the ash is still thick within, and the smoke has stained the walls and chairs and wood black. Back and to the left lies and opening the fire left, a charred passage to the grounds. Leaves and dirt have made their way into the room, concentrated the most heavily in that area. Behind the alter on the back wall, there is only one place left unblackened, which seems to have once been under a large cross, as the shape, if not the cross itself, is outlined on the wall.
Off to the right side of the sanctuary are a few doors leading to small and simple rooms, all bare at this point, but once used to house the priest and other permanent staff of the small parish. The first of the trio still has a rosary hanging on a peg in the wall. The others, however, hold nothing at all, only the effects of the fire.
Mid-evening at Xavier's, and with the bulk of the dorm kitchens cleaned and done for the day, Rashmi's come to the Chapel to relax, idly sweeping out the nave as she puts her thoughts in order. The only sound in the chapel is the gentle swish-swish-swish of the broom, and her occasional footsteps as she moves around the chapel floor.
The sweeping sound is broken by a knock on the door jam, where Lucas stands in the doorway. He's wearing a pair of ratty khaki cargo pants and a white Tshirt with a Vneck. Around his neck is a chain, and hanging from it is a little metal box with a guitar pick mounted within. "Ah heard you was on campus…"
The sound of the broom stops, and Rashmi stands still, back straight. "…Jinx called me, before I came over."
Lucas looks a little more serious, the smile dropping from his face. He closes the door, and moves towards her. "She told you about him. Connor thinks you can help us."
"She told me about him," Rashmi repeats, voice tight. "And about Robyn. …And about the hospital." And by the sound of her voice, it's immediately clear which of the three is taking priority in her mind.
Lucas tilts his head a little, "Ah don't understand…" He looks a little confused.
"You *never* understand," comes the heated reply as the redhead whirls, fixing Lucas with a bright, furious stare, eyes shimmering with tears. "All you ever *think* about is yourself! *I'm* going to run away, *I'm* going to be the one to get arrested, *I'm* going to visit my mother, *I'M GOING TO FAKE LIKE MY DEAD GIRLFRIEND IS STILL ALIVE SO I DON'T HAVE TO TELL HER THE TRUTH!*"
Lucas' shoulders slump just slightly, and he stands up a little straighter. "Oh." He slowly exhales, and he rubs his temples, "Rashmi… Dr. Brighton said the stress would be worse for her given her health… Ah was told by the doctor not to tell her…"
Rashmi's stunned disbelief, very nearly a palpable thing. "…Are you telling me that it never once occurred to you to borrow an image inducer thingy so at least *I* could go?"
Lucas furrows his brow, "No. It didn't, because that wasn't why Ah took Jinx there." He shakes his head, "Ah ain't had NO ONE pretend to be Sam. Frankly, it nearly made me throw up when Ah saw her. Ah've always just told my maw she was busy, or at school, or somethin'."
"So why? Why Jinx, and why couldn't you even bother to *tell* me you were going? I try *so hard* to keep from digging in, because I know you just *hate* people actually trying to get through to you." Her voice is quavering, thick with unshed tears. "And I *try so hard* not to ask for much… But you just keep doing this. Freezing me out of just *major* things in your life, and you don't even think I'm supposed to *care*…"
Lucas sighs, "It wasn't like that…" He shakes his head, "You're overreacting, Rash."
"Am I." The words are cold, clipped, and almost carved of solid granite.
Lucas nods, "Yeah. You are. Ah took her because she could use her touch power to help me make my hands go out, so Ah could actually touch my maw. And she could touch my maw and make her actually get some real sleep, with some comfort." He shakes his head, "It wasn't about me. Or her." He tilts his head a little, "Or you."
"…Well." Rashmi seems to deflate, shrugging to herself. "All right, then. I won't bother you anymore." Shaking her head, she sighs quietly, leaning the broom against one of the pews. "…Sorry for intruding."
Lucas sighs, his eyes closing for just a moment as he does. "Rash…" He opens them and looks at her, stepping over and, if she allows, laying his gloved hands on her shoulders. "We're both really stressed right now. A lot things are changing in our lives…"
Rashmi freezes in place eyes squeezing shut. "Yeah… but frankly? How much has it changed, really? I mean… be honest, Lucas."
Lucas furrows his brow a little, "What do you mean?"
"Lucas…" Her voice is strained, face falling to the ground. "What have I been trying to do since we got together?"
Lucas tilts his head a little, "…um… become a lawyer… right?"
"That was for *me,*" comes the annoyed reply. "About *us?*"
Lucas shakes his head a little. "Ah don't… Ah don't know…" There's a flash of worry on his face then. "Ah'm totally in trouble now, huh?"
"Not anymore, Lucas," Rashmi says, voice weary and resigned. "It's… just…. not important anymore."
Lucas' fingers move a little on her shoulders, nervously. "What do you mean?"
"You don't *need* me, Lucas," she says softly. "All you need is someone to point at and go 'yeah, she's my girlfriend.' Just… someone you know cares about you, right? You don't want a nosy, mouthy know-it-all digging into your personal things and making you feel like you're being shoved along."
Lucas releases her, taking a step back. "Ah don't… What are you saying…?"
"What the *hell,* Lucas?!" she cries out, utterly frustrated, "don't you ever rub two thoughts together on your *own* time?! Take a second and *figure it out,* and tell me how I'm wrong with a straight face!!"
Lucas furrows his brow, and then he looks down. He takes a step away from her once more, and then looks back at her eyes. "Okay," he says, quietly, some defeat in his voice. He slowly places his hands in his pockets. "You're moving on. Aren't you."
"I don't know, Lucas," Rashmi whispers. "Am I? Because I wonder… if you didn't just move on yourself, as soon as you kissed me…"
"Is that what you think of me?" Lucas asks, a little sadly. "Ah'm broken. Ah get that, believe me, Ah get that now maybe more than ever, but Ah ain't a douche bag."
"You tried to run off without telling me. You *hit me on the head.* You almost never tell me about anything important ever." Her lips purse, eyes fixing on Lucas' "What *is* a douchebag, Lucas? Because I'm not sure I have the definition right."
Lucas looks down again, at her feet. He slowly nods, pulling his left hand from his pocket, and clenching it tight in a fist at his side. "Okay." He grits his teeth a moment, and then nods once more. "Ah'm sorry, Rash."
"I am too, Lucas," the redhead whispers. "I *do* love you, and I want nothing but great things for the rest of your life… just… I'm…. not sure what you need is what I have to offer, you know…?"
Lucas clenches his fist a little tighter, and then the air around them begins to get warmer. He pulls his other hand from his pocket, and it, too is clenched. He nods, "…okay…" Theres a pop and hiss from one of his gloves. "Sorry…" And then he turns, and runs as fast as he can from the room.
Continues in Running Water log
