Players:
Summary: Nick talks to Taylor and Shane about his meeting with Emma, Nick takes things the wrong way.
Date: June 25, 2012
Log Title: Dwelling
Rating: PG-13
Xavier Mansion - Ramsey Dormitories Lobby
The lobby of Ramsey Dormitories has two elevators at one end of the wall along with the entrance to a cafeteria. On the wall are three pictures that say 'In memory of'. One is of Douglas Ramsey, another of John Proudstar and the last one is of Jean Grey. There are several couches and tables down here for students to relax. Large windows in the front and sides allow for a lot of light in the room.
It's on the later side of dinner time and the sun has been setting, leaving the sky a dusky colour. Nicholas has spent the better part of three hours in the stables grooming Orion. His hunger has struck so he's made his way to the dorms, getting lost in the process. He's finally made his way here and after seeing the cafeteria a bit too crowded for his tastes, he goes to sit in one of the chairs to wait. Nick leans forward so that his elbows are resting on his legs and his head hangs in his hands that run through his hair.
Taylor descends the stairs from the dorms, rubbing their eyes lightly, wearing a light green summer dress. The feline arrives at the base of the steps and then raises a hand towards Nicholas upon noticing him, "Hey, there, Nick. What's going on?" Tay stretches in the way only a feline can and then flops on one of the couches.
Shane emerges from the cafeteria, a tray in each hand. One is set on the coffee table across the wat from Nick's couch, the newly-freed hand coming up to tug her headphones down. Before her iPod can be paused, there's a short blast of what sounds like carnival music overlaid with heavy metal, accompanied by a joyful, sinister, Something wicked this way comes, something in the night! Something wicked that way went, what an awful fright! As she plops down, she nudges the tray toward Nicholas, setting her own in the now free place. "…'S meatloaf day. Cold meatloaf's fine, but reheating turns it to shit. So here." Leaning back on the couch, she sets her own tray on her lap, tilting her chin upwards in Taylor's direction. "Sup."
Nicholas looks up and it's obvious his eyes are red in that way that tell he's either not slept for a while or he's been crying. "Thanks Shane. How's it going?" He says giving her a weak smile. "Taylor, I need to talk to you, you got a moment?" He asks her as he starts to poke at his meatloaf a bit before taking a bite.
"Oh. Yeah, I've got a moment…" says Taylor, nodding once at that, and then nodding back at Shane and raising a paw-like hand. "Hey, Shane. I know what you mean, loved my dad's meatloaf, but hated my dad's leftover meatloaf once it was reheated…" The feline glances between the two with a bit of a curious look.
Shane looks up, peering at Nick's face for a moment, lips pursing. As he asks Taylor to talk, she looks up at the feline, lifting a shoulder slightly and raising an electric-green eyebrow, as if to say 'You know as much as I do.' Settling back on the couch, she turns her attention to her meal, letting the two talk.
"I talked to Ms. Frost today." Nicholas begins in between bite of meatloaf. "I brought up how you have trouble reading, if you want, you can go down to the Med-Bay for a bio-scan and they can check out your eyes so they can see what they can do to help you with reading." He says to her hoping she isn't mad about it. "My Mom used to put beer in her meatloaf."
"Oh, you went to her to ask that? I mean, I've been meaning to talk to her, but, I guess I've procrastinating… thanks, Nick," says Taylor, headscratching lightly, "I mean, for looking out for me and all. I'll go and get that whole… bio-scan thing done. I wonder what they scan for?"
"S'like an MRI," Shane supplies, once her mouth is clear. "'Cept they got more of that freaky alien shit, pretty much tells'm how everythin' works." Setting her plate back down, she adjusts the headphones on her neck. "…Guess that was half 'a how they figured out how m'powers work, 'r some shit. Prolly th'only girl I know, needs microchips in'r undies, but it works."
"I just figured I'd help with your procrastination, glad you're not mad." Nicholas says. "Well I had to talk to Ms. Frost about…other stuff so I just figured I'd mention it while there. And what Shane said about the bio-scan. Probably see what's up with your cat eyes and stuff."
"Why would I be mad? It's just… something I've been having a hard time getting around to. Maybe they'll give me sleeping pills or something so I can sleep at night," says Taylor, considering that for a moment and thnen shrugging. "I guess I've had an MRI, when my mutation first showed up, they didn't know what was happening and I was just in so much pain." The ocelot shrugs lightly, "I hope they can fix some of the problems I've been having."
Shane lifts up one of her heav y, armored boots, dropping it back to the floor with a thump. "Figure 'f they can't fix it, they'll figure out somethin' t'keep it from bein' a problem." That said, she turns to look at Nicholas, brow furrowing deeply. "…'N what about you? Y'look like ten miles o'shit, Nick. Sup?"
"I hope so too Taylor, maybe it'll make things easier for you too." Nicholas says before looking at Shane. "Huh? Oh just a lot on my mind today. Was talking to Ms. Frost about getting help, going to see a psychiatrist or something. We got to talking about my parents, she's going to see what she can to to help me get in touch with my grandparents and it was just a lot of talking, you know."
Taylor nods at Shane and says, "Yeah, I'm hoping so. I mean, maybe even get me something to shock me every time I feel like it's a good idea to chase down a squirrel or something." Taylor laughs a bit awkwardly at that, scratching an arm, and then says to Nick, "I've seen psychiatrists before. It can be helpful with dealing with some shit, really… So long as they aren't the ones all trying to medicate you for every little thing."
Shane bobs her head. "Parents took me to a psych once. Tried t'put me on lithium… I think. 'R onea those. Didn't fly, Dad half about lost 'is shit with th'guy, 'n ended up puttin' the prescription in the shredder. Don't trust psychs, but…" She snorts, shaking her head. "Like that's somethin' new. But yeh. Figure y'gotta talk t'someone knows what they're doin', Nick. Friends can't fix everythin', y'know?"
"I just can't deal with this." Nicholas says as if he's protesting them. "If they put me on drugs, maybe it'll help. Especially if it meant sleep." He really doesn't want to be put on any emotion numbing drugs even if he says otherwise. "I don't know if I trust them either but it's the only choice I have I figure. I don't know how to deal with it, I really don't."
"Oh, don't get me wrong… drugs have a place. But like… I just mean, one of the doctors I had before would barely even listen to me… if after listening, they give you something, I think it's cool…" says Taylor, shrugging lightly. "They'll know how to help, I'm sure…"
Shane nods. "We just got horror stories 'cos it don't work f'r us, Nick. Don't mean they ain't gonna help you. 'Specially 'f Ms. Frost's doin' the referral. Fuck… y'think a *telepath'd* stick you in a room with some dumbshit pusher?"
"I don't know, have no idea what to expect, I just know it's not going to be Good Will Hunting." Nicholas says, poking more at his meatloaf for a bit. "I guess there's nothing making me go if it doesn't work out. Starts on Thursday" He looks away from the two and lets out a breath. "And she offered for me to go back to North Dakota to say good bye to my parents and Bodie."
Taylor nods silently to the last bit of what Nicholas says and then remarks, "It might be good to get some kind of closure…" The feline pulls on the skirt of their dress lightly so it provides a bit more coverage past the knees.
Shane falls silent, carefully watching Nicholas between her bangs. "…Think y'r up to it?" she says, finally.
Nicholas snaps his head back so that he's looking at the two of them wide-eyed. "Are you nuts?! It's a horrible idea. I can't go back there, it's….I don't want to. It'd bring back everything, it'd be a reminder of everything. It'd be horrible. Yeah I'd like to see where, if they were buried but…it'd be way to painful to go back there. I'd see everything I lost."
Taylor starts wringing their hands lightly and then says, "I guess I've never had that, I've never lost anything like that, so I dunno…" The ocelot stares off silently for a few more moments, "I dunno, I know it's horrible, but you've been dwelling on it for a long time, like it's your focus almost all the time even now, and I know like just… dwelling on shit, it can be just as painful as that stuff in the first place, and maybe closure is what you need, one way or another… But… If you're not ready, you're not ready. I don't know."
Shane lifts up a hand. "S'cool, Taylor," she says quietly, eyes locked on Nicholas. "Dude knows what he needs. 'F he ain't ready t'go, he ain't, 'n forcin' shit like that's worse'n lettin' it sit." Looking down at her legs for a moment, she takes in a deep breath. "Thing is, though… Taylor's gotta point. Don't gotta be now, but… sooner or later, gonna hafta do it. Wait 'til you got y'head t'gether, sure… just don't wait too long. Onea the things that fuckin' Dr. Phil wannabe was always bangin' about. 'Too hard t'walk's bullshit, Shane,'" she says, pitching her voice lower and rougher, "'You either get your ass out that wheelchair now, or you ain't gonna ever get out, and there's people that need it worse'n you ever will.'"
"I'm sorry for dwelling on it." Nicholas says sounding annoyed. "I'll just get over it, don't worry. I guess I've surpassed the 'dwelling on it' time for dead parents." He says pushing his food away from him as he really isn't hungry anymore. "I guess you guys are just tired of dealing with me and my issues so we'll just drop it now." He says.
"Uh, no? That's not what I'm saying, Nick…" says Taylor, blinking a few times, "I'm saying, at some point, for /your/ sake and not for mine, I want you to enjoy life again at least a little. I'm not tired of anything, seriously. That's not what I'm saying. I just mean, you're ruminating, that's what my mom'd say, you're just ruminating and reliving it over and over. I don't want you to go through that over and over, that's all."
"Nick," Shane says quietly, staring at the boy's eyes, "Back it up. 'F Taylor didn't give a shit 'bout you, wouldn't say anything. 'F *I* didn't give a shit 'bout you, wouldn't be here. Ain't sayin' we're sick of it 'n shut up. 'N you talk like that again? Gonna pop you one. An' you'll deserve it."
"Why do you think I went to talk to Ms. Frost about seeing a psych?" Nicholas says sounding frustrated. "I'm trying to learn to deal with it okay? It's not easy, but you guys are harping on me like I'm doing nothing! I'm just not ready to go back to Martin, is that really a big deal? It's just…it's everything I've lost. Everything except Orion." He's trying to hide how irritated he really is but it's not going so well.
Taylor rubs their face and headshakes, "I don't think you're doing nothing either. I'm just… whatever, I'll shut up, 'cause seems like I'm digging a bigger hole for myself. I'm concerned about you, I want you to be happy, that is all."
Shane folds her arms and leans back in her chair, staring at Nick in seething silence, one eyebrow raised. Nothing more is said; apparently, nothing else *needs* saying. But clearly, Shane is not at all amused by what Nick is saying.
Nicholas stands up, picking up the food tray later. "I'm just having a bad day, sorry. I'll talk to you guys later." He says in a voice that sounds exhausted. He doesn't say much else as he goes to bring his leftovers and dishes into the cafeteria before heading up to his room.
Taylor blinks a few times and says, "Sorry, Nick. I mean, I am still here if you ever need to talk, I didn't mean to…" Once Nick is gone Taylor covers their face, rubbing their eyes, and says, "Fuck. I just wanted to help."
Shane tosses her fork down on her empty tray, nudging it forward on the table with her foot and standing. "Y'I know," she murmurs nudging Taylor's shoulder with the middle knuckle of her fist. "Ain't your fault. Dude gets all wound up like that, don't take more'n three wrong words 'n he blows up like I do. C'mon. Want you t'show me 'yfavorite doll outfit."
Taylor looks up when Shane speaks, unconvering their face and then the feline's ears perk up slightly. "Oh, for sure, though it's a little bit of a contest, I guess." Taylor gets up and then gestures towards the stairs, starting off.
Shane nods. "Good. Need a project, need more f'my portfolio, 'n you need somethin' nice. Pick th'one y'like best." And with that, she clumps her way up the stairs behind Taylor, sparing a glance at the hallway Nick took for a moment, before continuing on.
